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Tools

We need to know what to have in our toolkit. How to fix things when they're broken. How to open up. How to be kind to ourselves.

Who to call and how to call knowing you may get emotional, and knowing that's ok.

"Tell me normal things, tell me about work, I'm fine, tell me about you."

I have this cat sweatshirt, it has three cats on it and each cat is wearing some sort of Native American head dress. It's cosy, with a fleecy lining. It feels like a hug. An eccentric hug. But a hug all the same. And I wear it whenever I can really, but especially if I'm sad. It helps.

As does carrot cake. There's something about it. I don't tend to emotionally eat or overeat but I know that a bit of carrot cake will give me that feeling of safety. It's ridiculous really, but it makes sense, to me.

Sometimes I'll get really dressed up or wear more make-up than I normally would but other times I go with as little make-up as I can. A sense of - I'm riding this out, I don't want anything on me. I don't want to care about appearance.

I go for a walk and I get some air and I write - publicly or privately - and I sing. To no music or music but I force the sound out and it's dramatic and maybe a bit silly. I'm hopefully under my duvet.

Oh and a cup of tea. Always a cup of tea.

I'm not telling you put the kettle on - you'll feel better. I know it's not as simple as that.

I just think this toolkit, being aware of it, might be important. People look for comfort in all sorts of places - they drink to disengage, or get angry, or eat too much or not enough.

It's ok to be sad. Ride it out. Find a way to be comforted. A good way. You'll be ok.

Written as part of Cassy Fry's DIYCreativeClub challenge.

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